Seriously, I wish it was as easy as picking up a new jersey and picking out a cute team name, but unfortunately, I am wired with an attraction to men. It might be better to sit on the bench for a season or 2.
Dating is a tough game …
Especially if you are 35 and living in the South where social pressures dictate that you should be married with 2.5 kids. It forces you to settle and SETTLE I did.
Did this really happen?
I dated a man for over a year. He moved into my house with me after 5 months. The house I was living in did not even belong to me. It was my mother’s second home, and she let me and my boyfriend live there rent free to save money.
I will not deny that my mother put on the pressure and pretty much forced us into looking for homes. It meant that we had to leave the home she was allowing us to live in and get serious about our relationship. We talked about marriage, children, and all the usual stuff. The only thing missing was a permanent house to call OUR own.
So, we did what any normal couple would do on the road to our future … we put in a bid on a house. The deal was that since we were not married that he would finance the home and put the deed into both of our names. I never realized that he had a problem with this. He never voiced any concerns.
It all goes down from here …
To make a long story short, my parents loaned him thousands of dollars, and he even got money from me. He went to the closing, but he told me that I did not need to be present to sign the deed. I knew this was fishy, but I decided to trust him. Everyone told me something was wrong, but I was in denial.
Two days after the closing he was acting funny. I voiced my concerns to my step father who already knew in his gut that this house was not mine. He confronted the asshole, and he lied and to his face and said my name was on the deed.
Later that evening, I asked him again, and he said that my name was on the deed. He even produced a document that had both of our names and acted like I was crazy for not believing him. Little did I know, this document was the offer letter and not the signed contract.
His answer … you were mean to me the last month, and I did not feel loved.
Really? And, you are how old? Why did you not think to talk to me about it? Why did you lie? Why did you even buy the house? Why didn’t you back out before the closing? What were you thinking?
His answer … I didn’t know you were going to break up with me. I had to protect myself.
See why I wish I could switch teams?
Well, asshole, I had to protect myself too. You are history. Enjoy your new house all by your lonesome, and never contact me again. You are not the one. I am no longer settling for a mediocre, lousy lover. I need a real man with a real heart, a real brain who makes me actually feel alive. You are dead to me.